{"id":931,"date":"2015-04-15T08:50:56","date_gmt":"2015-04-15T16:50:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/?p=931"},"modified":"2015-04-15T08:50:56","modified_gmt":"2015-04-15T16:50:56","slug":"archaeologists-speculate-that-beer-was-instrumental-in-the-formation-of-civilizations","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/2015\/04\/15\/archaeologists-speculate-that-beer-was-instrumental-in-the-formation-of-civilizations\/","title":{"rendered":"Archaeologists Speculate that Beer Was Instrumental in the Formation of Civilizations"},"content":{"rendered":"

“Archaeologists speculate that beer was instrumental in the formation of civilizations.”<\/em><\/p>\n

-Wikipedia entry for “Beer.”<\/p>\n

Beer. When was it invented, why, how, who knows. Actually, I\u2019m certain quite a few people know. Probably know the exact day, the very minute. Some monk sitting in a chilly monastery, hands cupped reverently, holding a beautiful brown heap of barley. Ah.<\/p>\n

\"beer<\/a><\/p>\n

This bar is a monastery, the glass in front me a chalice, an icon of worshipfulness. I have a slight buzz. It\u2019s quiet in here, middle of the day. Dark. The smell of stale beer from the floor, a sweet smell, a little sour, as familiar as the sweat on the back of my neck, rapidly cooling. I walked here, for a beer, and I\u2019ll walk back home again when I\u2019m done. What\u2019s a few miles. Monks balanced kegs on the backs of donkeys and walked further to get that golden stuff to their other brothers in other monkeries.<\/p>\n

This table where I sit almost every Tuesday. That waitress. No, we call them servers now. Jeans and a t-shirt with the bar\u2019s logo on it, hair in a pony tail, toothy grin. Probably in college. No, probably dropped out of college. No, probably never went. Why bother. A few roommates, a three-a-month novel habit, discounts on bar-burgers. It\u2019s not a bad life. I\u2019m not jealous. But as I hold that cold glass in my hands, consider the bubbles rising, consider the deep yellow, I think, I could do that. I could work in a bar.<\/p>\n

Over there in a booth a guy and a girl are in deep conversation over a plate of French fries. He looks too old for her. A dozen scenarios run through my head. He\u2019s her older brother, and they\u2019re trying to figure out what to do about Grandma. He\u2019s her lecturer at the university, they\u2019ve been dating for two semesters, and they have to end it, his wife is getting suspicious. He\u2019s her boyfriend\u2019s best friend from college, and they\u2019re planning an intervention. I take a sip of my beer.<\/p>\n

Scratch that: gulp. More like a quaff. My glass is empty. Sunlight manages to negotiate a few clouds and the tinted windows, coats the foam left behind.<\/p>\n

At the bar itself, fella in sweats, sweaty, running-shirt, sweaty, ball cap, sweaty. After he finishes his beer, when he gets up to hit the head, that bar stool is going to be sweaty, too. I know this from experience. I\u2019ve run to bars before.<\/p>\n

Never ran from one, though. This is no biker bar, there will be no fisticuffs here. It\u2019s quiet, old Sub Pop concert posters on the walls. No pool tables, a menu full of foodie food. And pulls too hip for townies but not redneck enough for hipsters. My server comes over, points at my glass. I just smile. She smiles back and takes the glass away.<\/p>\n

Behind the bar, the owner, big fella, pear shaped until you get to his head, that beard, those black-rimmed glasses. On a Tuesdays if the server\u2019s not there, he serves me himself. When I\u2019m done with one, he\u2019ll say, how\u2019d you like that IPA? And I\u2019ll sort of nod and smile and say something like, I hope you\u2019ve got more.<\/p>\n

Another beer appears in front of me. I watch the server walk away. She stops at the booth with the couple. They look up at her, almost startled. I can\u2019t hear what they say, but she takes away their half-eaten plate of French fries. Must be serious, if you can\u2019t even finish your fries.<\/p>\n

My phone makes a noise in my pocket. I fish it out. Text message from the wife. Grocery store on the way back home. Milk, bread, eggs, something. I quaff once more. Before I leave, I drop too many bills on the table. Maybe it\u2019s a four-a-month novel habit. I don\u2019t want to assume anything.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Archaeologists speculate that beer was instrumental in the formation of civilizations.” -Wikipedia entry for “Beer.” Beer. When was it invented, why, how, who knows. Actually, I\u2019m certain quite a few people know. Probably know the exact day, the very minute. Some monk sitting in a chilly monastery, hands cupped reverently, holding a beautiful brown heap … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “Archaeologists Speculate that Beer Was Instrumental in the Formation of Civilizations”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[8,7],"tags":[28,27,22],"class_list":["post-931","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blogging","category-life","tag-bar","tag-beer","tag-writing-101"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p24y52-f1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/931","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=931"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/931\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1896,"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/931\/revisions\/1896"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=931"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=931"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bukkhead.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=931"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}