Confessions of a Robo-Runner

On my hip, a step counter. Pedometer, for those who like the lingo. Fitbit, to be precise– my brother-in-law-in-law (wife’s sister’s husband) got it because he thought he needed an incentive to move more, but was so demoralized by what it told him, he gave it up. Gave it to my wife, who lost interest after about a week. I’ve been wearing it for several months now. I love how it wirelessly sends info to my computer, and how I get emails telling me I’m only a few thousand steps from my daily goal. Sometimes I get those emails at 9 am after a run.

On my arm, tight on my bicep, a carrier for my phone, if I’m on an outdoor run furhter that will be me, at any moment, more than a 45 minute limp back home. The wife’s rule. She knows I’m too stubborn and proud to ask someone else if I need to borrow a phone to call her and let her know that I wasn’t hit by a car, dear, I just got a bad cramp and I’ll be back later than I expected.

Sometimes I take phone for other reasons– if I’m running to a bar and I want to check-in when I get the with Foursquare, or if Endomodo or Run Keeper are doing some sort of promotional thing, or if I want to play Zombies, Run! (the exclamation mark is in the title).

On my right wrist, either a Sony Smartwatch, or an iPod Nano (5th gen, the old new square one) attached to a watch-like wrist band. The Smartwatch is on if I’m also carrying my phone, as I can use it to control the music plaback, and also check messages that come in while I’m running, without the need to haul the phone itself out. My wife likes to send me texts, such as “where are you?” knowing full well I have no intention of responding. Good times.

The iPod Nano’s got the music on it, of course. I can listen to music on the phone, and will, sometimes, if I’m taking it and the Smartwatch is taking up wrist space. Otherwise, my Nano has a much better selection of music on it. I think I could put more music on my phone, but I am lazy. yes, I carry five or more electronic devices on my body when I run, and I’m calling myself lazy.

The Nano also acts as a back-up Nike+ appprovider, if for some reason the Nike+ GPS watch on my left wrist isn’t working for some reason. But when it is, this is the main record-keeper for the runs. It, like it’s name suggests, has the GPS, and also talks to a pod in my shoe to count steps. It doesn’t talk to the fit bit to count steps, but I wish it would, so they can compare notes. But nevermind that– best of all is the GPS part, because after a run outside, I plug the watch into my PC and get a map of where I ran, just in case, you know, of amnesia or something.

Not every time, but often, also clipped my waist band, a cheap MP3 player, as back up if the Nanos stops working, or if the phone runs out of songs. Music is, more or less, the only reason I run at all. The Nano is old enough that it sometimes decides to shut-down when I get too sweaty, and those jerks at the Apple store say the internal water-detector sticker’s turned red, so no free repair for me. Whatev. I got the cheap MP3 backup.

Strapped around my chest, not every time but more often if I’m runnning in the gym on a treadmill, my heart-rate monitor. This, like the map and the step-count, is pure information that doesn’t really do me much good. Today I ran 5k and my BPM never went above 140 (I could see it on the treadmill display itself, as the strap and the display are compatible, I guess). A few weeks ago I run a 5 miler for three miles my BPM was in the 170s. I’m sure some scientist could tell you what all the means. But my best marathon time is over four hours, and my best half marathon time is under 1:50, so I’m pretty sure nobody cares.

What’s it all for? Who knows. Incentive. I’m a gadget junkie as it is, and it’s fun to have all these geegaws and doodads to play with before, during, and after. I can tell my phone to tell people on Facebook I’m running, and they can send me applause as I go. I can look at the maps I’ve made, look at the elevation, and congratulate myself for losing only a few seconds per mile up a 4% grade. I can change from Flamenco to Surf to Hard Rock if the mood suits and I need an extra push to get over a rough mile of road.

But I’d throw it all away if that was the only way to keep my running socks. Just sayin’.

(also published on The Loop, the user’s blogs at Runner’s World)

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